We all love a good scandal. My home town has plenty in it’s history to create one juicy, prime-time drama that would make any Housewifes of New Jersey, (NY City, Orange County AND Atlanta) be put to shame. My mom and I were out to dinner the other night and someone came to the table to say ‘hello’ and as soon as she walked away I was trying to remember how I knew that family, which led my mom into explaining which led to ‘remember when this happened’, etc etc. I had forgotten about the cocaine trafficking scandal, the murder on the hill, the various embezzlement rumors and infidelity that would make a geisha girl blush.
Growing up you hear the highlights but you never really get the full story because you are too young to understand. As my mom and the others at the table reminisced about how much this town has actually been through it truly did sound like a story in the making. Nah…don’t get your hopes up…if I were to ever dreg up the truth on all of these scandals it’ll be AFTER I get done revealing my own dirty laundry for others to cipher through and hopefully learn from. ; )
Recalling all of these horrid details that happened to our neighbors (literally…) we began to talk about the demise of our own families brought on by choices made that have led so many down ugly and dark paths. “How is it that this happens to good families?” one woman asked retorically at the table. We all shook our heads because we all felt the despair. I’ll be honest, my own brother looks as if he’s knocking on death’s door and the door is opening a crack. He has type 1 diabetes and he is much much too thin. He came by last night and the first thing he said when I asked what he’d been up to was, “Just trying to stay alive.” I told him, “Well you need to do a better job at it because you look like crap.”
Granted, I’m sure that sounded mean but I’m desperate here. This IS something he can try to get a handle on but choices he is making in his life are literally killing him. How do you sit by and watch your brother die? We had discussed this at the table too…so many mom’s in the thick of watching their children slowly kill themselves by the choices they make. Now THAT is scandalous!
I pray. I pray for my brother, for ALL of my family every day. And maybe I hide from them too. I hide because it hurts too much to be in the presence of a battle that is not yours to win. If you wonder if I have tried ‘talking’ to him, the answer is YES. For years I’ve tried but he doesn’t want to listen. Now he just views me as ‘religious’ and ‘too good’ so I have taken to just loving him, telling him like it is, and praying.
Best gift I had today, though, was spending time with his daugther, my niece, and talking. She is 13 going on 14 and I didn’t let the opportunity pass to talk about all the things I’d want any 13 almost 14 year old girl to know. She got the Steubenville ‘Woman’s Talk’ one on one. 😉 Poor thing… ha! But she was receptive, asking questions and confiding a little as well, which is the gift.
I have already run into quite a few people I haven’t seen in years and it has been a joy to reconnect and get the highlights of their life. I am no longer anxious or anticipating anything. I’m here to enjoy the gift of the reconnection…and maybe get a thrill out of hearing about the latest scandal. 😉
Blessings!
Shannon