There is often a theme that runs through my day and today was all about a lesson in parenting.
This morning Seth had a scraped knee and was convinced he couldn’t bend it or put on his baseball pants…it was a downright tragedy! I wanted to roll my eyes, I wanted to tell him, “Come on, you barely scraped it put on the pants!” Instead I felt a nudge inside, that change in attitude realizing this could be a moment to show him compassion instead of irritability. It made me think of how often God probably wants to roll His eyes at me and instead He offers compassion lifting me up out of my self -pity.
Then this afternoon the boys were fighting like two hogs going after one apple. The deafening noise of high pitched whining and teasing nearly drove me into a padded cell. Taking a son, each in one hand, I situated them on opposite sides of the room. It took all the control I could muster not to scream them into submission, instead I gave them each that look that said, “If you want to remain living in this world then you might want to listen to what I have to say.” Then I proceeded to lecture them on how important family is and how much we need family to support us when we have enough bullies in the world to put us down, make us feel less than, and want to fight to gain control. A family is sanctity from a world where success is more important than love. I told them they were both special and special to me and that it hurt me to hear either one of them put the other down or to fight with them. When they fight with each other they are hurting me. Then I walked out of the house and went ‘for a walk’ (I just started down the street). On my little jaunt in the neighborhood I realized how much it must hurt God to see his children fighting with one another. “Love one another as I have loved you,” was Jesus’ last command to all of us. About 3/4 the way down the block Seth comes running after me. I turned around to face him and he said, “Mom, we are sorry. We will get along.”
Later this evening when I went to Mass with the boys we went up for communion and when Ryan went up he didn’t receive the Sacrament, instead he had his arms crossed for a blessings. I was behind him and realized the Eucharistic Minister blessed him and did not give him communion. I first I thought she was mistaken and that’s when I saw he had his hands crossed. After taking communion I went to pray and leaned over to Ryan saying, “I’m proud of you. You know when to receive. I don’t know if I would’ve had the courage to do that when I was your age, or even now.” He looked at me and smiled, “I just couldn’t, Mom.” In all reality, being that he’s only 11 he probably still could have received, I can’t imagine that his sin was a ‘moral’ sin but the lesson I learned in that moment was that my son knows the relationship he has with God and that he wants to make it right.
I don’t know if anything I did today was right. I did the best I could. But I will say that I am blessed to have the opportunity to be their mom.
Blessings
Shannon