Sometimes God gives us a directive so clear we can’t it until we’ve actually followed through.
This morning in prayer I picked up the book “The Inner Voice of Love” by Henri Nouwen. I have it sitting next to my journal and for the past year I have been reading a chapter every now and then when I feel ‘called’ to. This is per the directive Henri Nouwen gives himself on the first page entitled, “A Suggestion to the Reader” so I followed suit. Each chapter was written separately and not in fluidity of the one before or after. So when I read one I’ve written the date next to it in the chapter contents.
Today I picked one, read it, contemplated the message and meditated on it for a bit but before putting the book down I was compelled to go through the contents and just see if one really stuck out to me. One I read nearly a year ago to the day called my name. It is entitled, “Let God Speak Through You”.
Upon reading it this second time around I recognized a few key sentences that struck me deep…and I could see why I ‘got’ them today versus how I would have received them a year ago. What struck me from this particular chapter was this sentence:
“While acknowledging your woundedness, do not let go of the truth that lives in you and demands to be spoken.”
The entire chapter resonated within my spirit but this sentence was a clear directive. I underlined it and then circled the chapter in the contents so I would know to go back to it again. Then I picked up my journal and began my morning prayer. After writing two pages, and thanking God for the ‘directive from the book written by Henri Nouwen’ I read the quote that was on the 2nd page of my journal entry: (I kid you not!)
“You are confronted again and again with the choice of letting God speak or letting your wounded self cry out. Although there has to be a place where you can allow your wounded part to get the attention it needs, your vocation is to speak from the place in you where God dwells.” ~ Henri J. M. Nouwen
Um, HELLO??, Yes, Lord, I hear you. I’m listening! 🙂
I love love love it when God is that clear, that direct, that LOUD. Even though it was only 6:53am I wanted to sit down and write this post for the day because He clearly SHOWED UP…but I didn’t…and I know why. That was for me, but yet it wasn’t just for me.
Late this afternoon I met with a young woman whom I’d been in contact with before. She struggled with a particular issue in her home and struggles with a sense of obligation that was forced upon her not because of what is right but out of others selfish desires and lack of boundaries. We discussed this concept of ‘healthy boundaries’, especially given her adult age now, and as I listened I began to hear what I felt God was allowing me to see so clearly.
I pulled out a pen and paper and asked her to state her facts…the facts of her situation that simply can’t be changed. They are her life now and it is what it is. So I wrote them down. It is because of these ‘facts’ that the ‘obligations’ she was guilted into within her home clearly and irrefutably no longer could be her obligations. That is an absolute fact.
The light of recognition and truth lit up her face. “You’re right. I guess I was seeing what they keep telling me instead of what is my truth.” I encouraged her that even though she she has these wounds that will take time to nurse and set healthy boundaries around the actual facts of the situation is what God has set for her and what she needs to adhere to. With prayer, and a push of confidence the push for healthy boundaries will be set and hopefully this young woman can begin to live free of some very unhealthy ties that have kept her bound.
The message this morning was for me but it was also a prelude into what He needed me to realize in order to ‘…speak from the place in you where God dwells.’.
When we speak from the place within us that the Almighty dwells we can be calm and fearless.
Blessings
Shannon