Not sure how to catch everyone up. I did a reflection for a bible study on the Gospel of John last week that I was not able to deliver … in the reflection I mentioned how I felt we should be studying Job as it seems that is what my life is currently mimicking at this time. I couldn’t deliver the reflection personally because my father-in-law passed away.
Yes, the book of Job seems more appropriate.
For hardship does not spring from the soil, nor does trouble sprout from the ground. Job 5:6
Words have not come to me because of the hardship I’ve been experiencing. I’m not writing because family before ministry is putting me to the test. There are nights the words won’t stop! There is so much I want to say. I joke that God is having me live out my 3rd book in a matter of nine months. He has led me through the longest, darkest valley’s and I have not feared.
The Harvey Weinstein mess has plagued me. How much I want to say and then it was said before me because I sat in the ICU with my father-in-law caring more about if his blood pressure was dropping or to make sure he had ice chips when he asked for it. Do I care about these women who have come forward? Absolutely! Am I shocked by how MANY have come forward? NO. Should anyone be shocked?? NO!! There are movies and TV shows that joke about having to ‘sleep your way’ into a role. What? It can be joked about but then we are shocked that it was for real??? Am I surprised that actors we have loved and adored for all these years are being named culprits of sexual assault? NO… I believe I have posted many of times that those who are the predators do not look like monsters. I get it. No one wants to believe someone we have looked up to, that we have felt good about, and admired can do things that make us cringe inside. That is why we have men and women come to Hopeful Hearts Ministry for peer support when they are in their 50’s and 60’s because they could never talk about it. No one would believe or even listen.
But, none of that matters when you are face to face with a loved one fighting death.
And it really doesn’t matter when his body shows it’s ‘had enough’ but his mind and spirit look you in the eye desperate to keep up the fight but realizing it’s time. It’s time. I knew he was tired and to watch my husband and mother in law desperate to make time recant its hours is difficult.
There is no simple cure for the pain a woman, or man, feels when they have been betrayed, assaulted, or boundaries have been crossed. Their pain, their hurt, their frustration, is theirs. The same goes for the loss of a loved one or the shock of a health scare. And in turn the same for shock that is incurred by the stolen comfort and safety a natural disaster rips from your life.
Pain is pain. We have a right to say we hurt. And in speaking up we heal.
Healed people heal people.
What I am trying to say is WE ARE ALL SURVIVORS it’s what we DO WITH THE PAIN that matters. Will we fester in it and allow the enemy to steal our joy and gray our days? Or will we allow that pain to build strength within our spirits that help us to rise up and as we say in Texas ‘take the bull by the horns’?
If allowed, God can take that pain and turn it into a blessing. He will not dismiss the loss. He will not cover up the betrayal. He will not turn away from the frustration. He will take it all in and turn your gaze to the new He will create and rebirth from it all. Surviving to THRIVING…that is the true essence of LIVING.
The latest insight of my life in pictures.